You guys know me—I’m pretty positive. However, positivity isn’t always best, especially when someone is in pain. A “You’ve got this!” when someone is truly hurting can make you seem unemphatic and cause people to withdraw. Psychotherapist Whitney Goodman coined this attitude as “dismissive positivity.” If you are trying to help someone struggling, here are some small tweaks she recommends: Think happy thoughts. → It’s probably pretty hard to be positive right now. I’m putting good energy into the world for you. Everything happens for a reason. → This doesn’t make sense right now. We’ll sort it all out later. For you out there struggling, this is hard. You are strong. You have done hard things before. I believe in you.