It’s Never 50/50

Creating a true partnership means that it’s hardly ever a 50/50 divide. Life is too unpredictable. We need to be able to flex with our (and our partner’s) needs.  Enter Brene Brown’s daily check-in with her husband: Each of them communicate how much gas they have left in the tank. (If you don’t have a partner, you can do this check-in with yourself.) Somedays he’ll come home and say, ‘I only have 20%.’ To which, she responds, ‘Don’t worry. I’ve got the other 80.’ Other days,

What would you regret?

When deciding what to do, a key question for me is, “If I do/don’t do X, would I regret it?” For example, I had to decide whether to fly cross-country for an interview versus doing it on Zoom. I knew that I would perform better in person. If I didn’t fly out and didn’t get it, I’d always wonder, “What if?” This practice works for decisions as small as deciding to be 10-minutes late to get the extra cuddles in, or as big as launching that dream side hustle.  Life’s too shor

Your Co-mingled Life Plan

This week we’re focusing on holding a relationship check-in with your partner inspired by Uplift client, Morgan Courtney, and sharing some of her (and ours) suggested activities. If you don’t have a partner, you could check-in with yourself. Finally, do a combined life plan. In Morgan’s words… In 2-3 year increments, plan from this year out through retirement (the intervals get longer later in our timeline). Each person gets one color of sticky note, so that you easily identi

What’s on your radar?

This week we’re focusing on holding a relationship check-in with your partner inspired by Uplift client, Morgan Courtney, and sharing some of her (and ours) suggested activities. If you don’t have a partner, you could check-in with yourself. Next, you’ll find out what matters most to each of you: Draw a radar, and each spoke is a different topic: career, health, family, finances, hobbies, faith, etc. Each partner ranks how much each matter on a 1 to 10 scale. Discuss why and

A Relationship Pulse

This week we’re focusing on holding a relationship check-in with your partner inspired by Uplift client, Morgan Courtney, and sharing some of her (and ours) suggested activities. If you don’t have a partner, you could check-in with yourself. Let’s start first with your relationship. (Ideally, you think about these answers before the check-in.) What do you think the other person is doing really in your relationship? What do you think you are doing well? What would you like mor

A New V-Day Date Idea

I kind of hate Valentine’s day. It always felt like a hyped-up marketing ploy to get me to buy an overpriced dinner. That’s why I love Uplift client, Morgan Courtney’s reframing it as an annual check-in on her relationship: My husband and I started our very nerdy (and sort of romantic) tradition of life planning after realizing that common pitfalls lead to divorce—money, intimacy, resentment from missed opportunities that resulted from a lack o

Create a Safeword

My team is wicked smart and incredibly hard-working, so when something isn’t working, it’s not them, it’s the process. Yet, recently I noticed that it was hard for me to criticize the process without people taking it personally. Then I stole a page from my Operations Director, Nayef. We created a safeword. (Pineapple for those who are interested.) When anyone wants to give feedback on how things are going, we say “Pineapple.” Then everyone knows this isn’t about “them.” It im

What’s your version of mini-storage?

After Rowan was born, I made huge life shifts, including leaving Google and starting Uplift. I lost 45 pounds, collaborated with Jeff Koons, started meditating, and just plain enjoyed life. But, it all started with mini-storage. I was living in a small, NYC apartment, and we had a large storage unit off-site. As a working mom, my life was crazy, and I hated the management of ‘stuff’ that the unit entailed, moving things in and out of storage. On mat leave, I read The Life Cha

What would make this your best year yet?

Today, a very powerful question has been swirling in my head—What would make 2020 my best year yet? 2017 was my best year. I created so many memories. Joe and I became tourists in our own city as we prepared to move to DC. I was energized by the impact Uplift could have as I developed early concepts. And, the kids and I did epic adventures such as our NYC donut tour. I was living life. This year, I’m challenging myself to channel the 2017 Kari. Surround me with the moms we ar

Minimum Viable Effort

When picking your new resolutions, starting small is key. Pick something that feels laughably easy. Don’t try to meditate every day for 15-minutes. Start with one. Then build. Pick the ‘minimum viable effort’ that makes you feel like you are succeeding. As James Clear says in his incredible book, Atomic Habits: “The idea is to make your habits as easy as possible to start. Anyone can meditate for one minute, read one page, or put one item of clothing away. And, as we have jus

Time for your 20 for 2020

Every year, I steal a page from Gretchin Rubin and do a “20 for 2020” (or whatever the year is). It’s a list of things I want to do for the coming year. This is my third time, so I’ve learned a few best practices: One-off work better than recurring. If you miss a recurring one upfront, it’s really hard to get back into it. Have a mix of small and big Action items work better than results (e.g., “work with a doctor” vs. “fix my gut”) Make it measurable (e.g., “do a Whole30” vs

Write a letter to future you

Recently a friend told me about a tradition she does each new year—writing a letter to herself a year from now. I just did it: First, I wrote about where my head was at right now—what I was worried about, where my life was. Then I wrote about my hopes for myself. And finally, I reminded myself of what works for me to chill the f*** out. (Trust me, I need a constant reminder.) What’s in your letter? Don’t just think, “That sounds like a great idea.” Take 15 minutes this week a

My weekly planning process

Every Sunday morning I spend 15-minutes journaling about the past week and the one ahead. First, I ask myself four questions about the past week: Why will I remember it? What did I do well? What do I want to do differently? What did I learn? Then looking ahead, I have a list of areas in my life that I check-in on—kids, my relationship, health, and social. I set two or three intentions for each: What few activities with the kids will make this week special? When will Joe and I

How to maximize each season of life

This week I had an eye-opening chat with Bill Perkins, author of Die with Zero, in which he helps you make the most out of each season of life. Seasons might be major changes like your switch to being a parent, or minor ones like your kids outgrowing playing a favorite game with you. You die many deaths, not just one. I will never be a college student again. I will never not be a mom again. I will never breastfeed again. In order to maximize life, you need to match the experi

Visualize How Little Time We Have

Over the next couple of weeks, I’ll be sharing some “Dad hacks” from a Marc Picket, who is raising two young kids on his own. I love his approach and hope it can help us all see a different perspective. The first dad hack to help fix my mindset is to realize that with kids 3 and 5 years old, I only have them both in the house for 13 more years. That's 676 weeks. I made a chart showing what this looks like. If every O is a weekend, then this means I have this many weeks with

Weekly Wins Wednesday

You know me. I love traditions. So, enter a new one for Uplift—Weekly Wins Wednesday. Each week (either here or on our Instagram), we’ll celebrate all of our wins. Call out the little (or big) things in our life that are going well. So often, it’s easy to focus on the negative versus everything going right. So for me: All of our pilots at companies are converting to bigger deals! Joe and I have had some really great recent dates (both at home and out) I’ve been slipping in a

Live Like a Dream

I recently heard phenomenal artist, Dustin Yellin speak. He's working on an insane project where he is turning an oil tanker on its side for a monument in NYC that will be bigger than the Eiffel Tower in order to raise awareness around global warming. Someone asked what his dreams at night were like. His answer: Boring. He said his awake life seems like he is on acid. Everyone in the world is beautiful. The world is full of color and life. His dreams, on the other hand,

Count Your Attempts

I just finished watching Chloe’s soccer game and was inspired by one of the moms. She encouraged her daughter to set a goal for how many times she was going to touch the ball each half. I loved this. The goal of touches encouraged risk-taking. Also, the girl has far more control over her attempts versus goals (or something more outcome-oriented). Chloe set her sights at four times. The look of pride she had when she hit it melted my heart. How many times are you going to hit

Break Down Your Big Goals

I’m all for big lofty goals. Lose 20 pounds. Get the promotion. Save enough for that new house. These goals (known as outcome goals) are super motivating, but they are also super paralyzing. Where do I even begin? Today’s tip: Find someone who is where you want to be. Then break down the actions and habits that got them there. Eat veggies each meal. Drink eight glasses of water a day. Only drink two days a week. These actions become your roadmap on how to get there. Pick th

Create a Zen Den

We just added a new addition to our family’s bedtime routine—Zen Den, from Cosmic Kids. These short YouTube videos teach my kids mindfulness and wind them down at the end of the day. I discovered these one Saturday when I was a stressed out mess. I personally needed them, and we binged watched six until I calmed myself down. I’m learning in each, let alone my kids. Some highlights… Thoughts are like bubbles, just pop the ones that aren’t serving you Instead of feeling ‘wan